Oh my god.
I had a realization today of how much I still completely blame myself for all my problems. I was talking to RS today about how I troubled I am and he totally disagreed.
He has a theory that everyone has the same amount of problems. He believes they are just manifested differently.
And I totally realized that I think I can help having my issues. It’s like I think I am choosing to have them. I was born with my issues as much as anyone else was. I can’t help or change the things that have happened to me.
It felt so good to come to that realization. And so weird to realize I wasn’t already thinking it. I don’t know why I decided to start blaming myself for the things that have happened. But I am stopping right now.
I wouldn’t blame someone for being lactose intolerant. Or for having a heart defect. So why am I blaming myself for my issues?