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Still afraid of the dark…

My therapist seems to think that my fear of monsters and of the dark is actually a metaphor for something else. She says my fear of monsters is actually a sense of dread of a non-specific event.

There are real life monsters. There are people that do bad things. I have had a lot of monsters in my life. There is nothing wrong with being afraid of bad people. Even the ones from my past that are no longer in my life. And it is natural to fear encountering monsters in my future. especially since some of the monsters from my past are still in my life. And it is pretty natural to worry that a past full of monsters will mean a future full of them too.

She also thinks that my fear of the dark is based on negative experiences that happened in the dark. Both in the literal dark and the figurative dark. Bad things do tend to happen in the dark. It makes you feel alone and invisible, no matter where you are or what time of day. Sometimes the most isolating experiences are when you are surrounded by others.

Most violence occurs at night. Most abuse occurs at night. Most sexual abuse, especially as a child, occurs at night. The dark is a good cover. It offers protection for monsters. And it is scary for people who have previously suffered alone and in the dark. Not being able to see someone. Being vulnerable alone, at night while asleep.

These are actually fully logical fears.

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